Make Life Magical with tidylodge: Bridging the Gap Between Therapy, Coaching & Magic

One evening before Christmas, on my husband’s birthday and the anniversary of my Father’s diagnosis, we all sat down to have dinner before my mother went to see my brother in Perth, Australia. We had all spent the past five months grieving the death of my Father and my Grandfather, who died within days of each other. My Mum had found this book that looked so old the pages were turning a yellowy brown hue, it had a letter with it, it was a letter my mother had written my father stating that if she had An hour to live, An hour to love, this is what she would say. We all sat around the table and took turns reading the book whilst sobbing, then we read the letter, feeling a little moment of relief that Mum had taken the time to tell Dad what she would say to him if she knew she only had one hour left with him.

I learnt a lot that evening from that exercise which was melancholically cathartic and almost magical in the shared love and emotions. I learnt the importance of giving and showing love in everything we do, in every moment we can, with every fibre of our being. I am an avid believer in the law of attraction and if you asked me my way of life I would say to be love in every essence of the word. With everything we encounter in life it is not always easy to have our love hats on, that is why heightened awareness is ever so crucial. Like a marriage and a relationship, to hone the skill is to nurture it daily, water it like our beautiful Christmas Poinsettia in the living room.

This reading and this display of love and affection between my mother and father was the catalyst for my continued quest to be love, to show more love and to truly understand the meaning of love. Often my husband has spoken of how he does not believe in anger in a relationship, and as much as I would love to believe this too, I had doubts at the time that how can two people be under one roof and not get angry at each other at some point. His love alone has shown me the importance of acceptance, forgiveness and the significance of the relationships we have with the people we love. I believe that with a lot of effort in communication and the law of attraction, love can actually envelop us in every area of our lives until its presence feels like a magical force. After all, that is what love is, energy, a magical, mystical, scientific force of nature that we can all harness. I don’t mean it in some wishy-washy sense, I just mean that love really is the secret of life, and with a little practice, it can follow us even in the darkest of times.

What losing my Father, this letter and this book taught me, is that our live’s are so precious, that in the blink of an eye, everything can change and that we are not immune to hardship. You talk of these things happening to others, they never happen to my family, but that is just not true, we are not immune. When my father passed away, I grieved hard; I felt every feeling there was to feel. I thought my heart would explode and my lungs would give way from the pain and grief of losing the only man who had ever stuck by me my whole life from start to finish, the one man who stuck up for me at every chance, who made me feel I could conquer the world. The one man, who, despite all my efforts to rebel against life, was there around every corner to pick up all the broken pieces. The sacrifices that man made for me are just insurmountable. I literally owe him my life. If only he had one more hour to live and I had one more hour to love!

A woman was in her study room.

She appeared very sad and down.

She picked up her pen and started writing the following:

I did not get an interview for the jobs I applied for.

My Employment Pass was rejected and my husband could not get back to Singapore, so I had to travel to India.

My Mother is so sad and I feel helpless.

My Family lives all over the world and I didn’t get to go home to England for Christmas or New year.

My Father was terminally ill and died at the young age of 58.

My Grandad also passed away this year

a few days before my dad.

At the end she wrote, this was such a bad year!

Then, the woman’s husband came into the room and saw her looking lost and confused, he saw the paper she had written and gave her a kiss on the forehead and left the room. A few moments later he came into the room and handed her a piece of paper, he placed it in his wife’s hand.

When she saw the paper it had her name on the top and it said:

I got married this year to the love of my life

and my Father was able to be at my

wedding as well as many other relatives

and friends who flew over at that time.

I did not get the jobs I applied for,

but I have set up a private practice

as well as helping out with multiple business’s.

This has led to happenstance opportunities

taking form in my career path, and my husband’s, which has allowed me to help carry on my Father’s legacy.

I got to go to India, where I found myself again,

had a spiritual awakening,

and lots of time with my new husband.

We also found a solution to our visa issues

and my husband was granted his EP,

which means everything is falling into place.

My Father may have passed away at 58, but he lived to have my brother and me, he met my mum at 18 and they had kids at 23, which meant he had lots of time with us. I got to spend so much time living at home with my parents and then, when his illness took a turn for the worse, I helped care for him. Most people I’ve read about become depressed and aggressive as the illness progresses, but Dad turned mellow and appeared quite serene. He even said when I asked him how he was feeling one day, “I’m happy darling”. I said, “What is making you happy dad?” and he said with a big smile on his face and a glow in his eyes, “Because I am around you and your mum and the people I love”. Some people die very young, too young to even have kids. My dad lived to teach us enough over the years to know how to live without him if we ever had to. That is something to be grateful for.

My Mother is pushing herself to do things out of her comfort zone despite her grief and has two kids who will do anything to make sure she’s ok and as happy as possible given the circumstances. She met my Dad young and had 40 years with him, which is an awesome amount of time. I have been able to help her a lot with all their personal affairs all because of my Father’s teachings. My Family and friends live all over the world, I have so many places to visit and reasons to go back home, which is such a luxury.

At the end it said: This year was a year of blessings and every little thing you do is magic. The woman was amazed and so happy at the interpretation of the events in her life that year!

Moral of the Story: It is essential for us to see, that in our lives, it is not happiness that makes us grateful, but gratitude that makes us happy and in that happy grateful state, life becomes magical. Always look for the blessings in life, no matter how bad the circumstances may seem. Gratitude is the formula for an abundant and happy life!

Make Life Magical!

At tidylodge we help you to create “real Magic” in your everyday life, finding magic in the day-to-day tasks, despite trials and tribulations. We utilise evidenced based theories with our creative brand of programmes that enable us to take you on a journey for the cup of life. For some it may be hard to contemplate magic in our everyday lives, when the little nuances of life might feel as though they are blocking us from our powers. Yes, that’s right, our powers, we actually do have some innate abilities that if we learn how to tap into them can make life magical. Some people call these supernatural, others call it God and many call it science, harnessing areas of the brain that need a little exercise. Now the theory that we only use 10% of our brain is not actually true, it was debunked in a study in frontiers in Human Neuroscience. We can actually access different components of the brain at different times, depending on the level of activity, which means the brain can function at various percentages.

We all have some magical abilities and after all, magical just means that it is hard to explain or that it is captivating and enchanting. We agree with Dr Seuss, we “like nonsense, it wakes up the braincells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in life.” NLP and Hypnotism have close links and are effective modalities for treating clients with years of research on human consciousness. Some theorists claim they can cure a phobia in one session and the evidence is there. We all have extrasensory perception and intuition, both of which are correlated. We can feel when something is right or wrong long before we physically know it. Our sixth sense is evidence of “real magic”, married people will relate to this one well, being able to feel your partners emotions, sense when they are coming home are all examples of this.

As described in Psychology Today, these are some examples of the innate powers we do have. Therapy and coaching can unblock subconscious barriers that have been collected through conditioning and loss of identity over time and lead way to utilising the mind to a fuller capacity, creating a sense of nothing short of “real magic”. Now, we may not subscribe to the idea of literal mind reading per se, but psychology tells us that there are inborn abilities within us all to intuitively understand what someone is thinking or feeling by witnessing their eyes. Women are apparently more adept at this than men, a study found that this particular magic is routed in genetics.

“I do believe in an everyday sort of magic — the inexplicable connectedness we sometimes experience with places, people, works of art and the like; the eerie appropriateness of moments of synchronicity; the whispered voice, the hidden presence, when we think we’re alone!”

– Chris De Lint –

Meditation has proven to have profound affects on brain health, it is needed to control emotions, as is the air we breath to control our oxygen intake, studies show it improves function and work performance if practiced consistently. A man once asked Buddha “what have you gained from meditation?” He replied: “Nothing. However, let me tell you what I lost: anger, anxiety, depression, insecurity, fear of old age and death.” The brain needs time to recuperate, as with the body when it is exercised, the muscles need respite to heal. The brain may not be a muscle like the heart, although it is known to behave as a muscle, and so when exercised, requires time to rest and regenerate neurons. Although the brain does get rest whilst we are sleeping, meditation is a different kind of recuperation that is crucial to the brain in order to utilise its potential, as it is in a higher state of consciousness due to us being awake. It is a state whereby one can control the mind, which in itself is a magical power. In a hundred years or so, humans will be looking back in history with disbelief that not all people practiced daytime mental rest, as they practiced nutrition and exercise. This is one example of how “real magic” can be accessed in our day-to-day lives. Meditation is spiritual, it is religious and it is scientific, it is your choice what it means to you.

At tidylodge, we believe in the Law of Attraction, during the major research phases for tidylodge, we stumbled across Wayne Dyers book, Real Magic: Creating Miracles in Everyday Life. It was incredible because it was describing the premise of tidylodge. We genuinely believe we attracted that book into our line of research, because Wayne, with a little assistance from Houdini, has created the perfect definition of “real Magic” that fits our ethos:

“According to the illustrious magician Harry Houdini, magic is achieved through illusion. A simple example is an illusion created by using smoke and mirrors. The illusion is called magic simply because it appears to be unexplainable. Late in his career, though, Houdini alluded to something that he had experienced which he called “real magic.” He apparently had acquired the ability to produce results that were in fact unexplainable. These magical results could not be accounted for even as the product of illusion… You, like most people, are probably convinced that if something is real it cannot be magic, and if it is magic it cannot be real. However, it is my belief that when we get caught in this paradox we are inhibited from experiencing our magical dimensions. I believe that we experience real magic when we transcend the paradox and that the transcendent view encompasses the experience of real magic as indeed very real, and also magical.” Make life magical!

 

COPYRIGHT © 2019 tidylodge Pte. Ltd. ☆ Kellyjo Coney-Khan

Contact tidylodge

Individual Adult and Adolescent

Therapy & Coaching

Relationship Magic for Couples

Singapore: +65 8121 7159

Email: klc@tidylodge.com